errands

There are weeks when it seems all I get done is running this way and that.  This was one such week.  Don’t get me wrong.  It’s been a good week – ever so productive.  It’s just been a bit crazy.  Here are a few of the places you could have spotted me this week …

Strength training.  We started Palates this week for strength training.  Now I have a hard time balancing on my own two feet – and they’re wanting me to balance atop a large rubber ball.  Needless to say, I was the only one in the class who could not – for the life of me – alight.  I did, however, get a good calf-workout from the tippy-toe action I had goin’ on.  I’ll keep practicing; after all, it’s always good to add skills.  That way, if my writing gig doesn’t pan out, I can always join the circus.

Car dealership.  Took my car to the dealership for an oil change.  Thankfully they did not ask what happened to my bumper.  No matter how you explain it, it always manages to come out like, “Dude!  I totally drove through a fence … it was AWESOME!”  Of course, I fully intended to take advantage of the time waiting for my car by editing.  I sat to the back of the waiting area … away from the door and the television … pulled out my hard copy, my pen, my highlighter, my wee sticky notes and began mumbling quietly to myself.  It didn’t work.  First, I had to worry about the little fellow who wobbled back to my area and struggled to get up on a chair … all while his father laughed from afar.  Seriously.  The floor was slate; and he was precarious at best.  Luckily, he got bored and moved on.  Mr. Banker Man took his place.  Mr. Banker Man decided to make an all-important-phone call – but he didn’t want to disrupt the group of men watching ESPN, so he casual strolled back and hovered right next to me.  I will never – in a million years – bank where he works.  Not that I’m bitter …

Walgreens.  With Easter being Sunday, I ventured to Walgreens for chocolate and cellophane.  Found the chocolate – could not find the cellophane.  Finally broke down and asked the clerk.  She rolled her eyes and pointed.  There it was,  wedged between the DVDs and cameras.  Oh, right… that’s all I got out before she smirked and said, “Yeah, I’m like Whatever …it’s right there!”  Right, whatever, because I was only looking down the Easter and wrapping isles – places that ACTUALLY MADE SENSE!!!  Aaah, feel that Easter love …

Albertsons.  Coupons in hand, I headed to Albertsons to buy a few groceries.  I had just grabbed a box of kleenex and was heading for the milk, when I heard a cart coming.  Instead of inching out into the isle, or glaring at the person walking in front of me, I decided I would just pretend to be looking at an item to purchase.  Out of the corner of my eye I noticed it was a guy who works at Albertsons … see him quite frequently, actually.  It was about that same time I truly paid attention to what I was intently starting at.  I don’t even have to say it, do I?  That’s right.  Trojans.  Pleasure pack or ecstasy?  It’s so hard to choose …

Starbucks.  Met my friend at Starbucks this morning.  We were just getting ready to leave when she exclaims, “Winston!”  Winston, you see, attended High School with us.  Now you must understand, the same pitiful syndrome that assails me when I meet a cute guy, hits me when I see someone from High School.  If you’ve ever seen me in action, you understand this is a grave, grave situation.  So there I sat, concentrating all my energy on my invisibility superpowers.  It would have worked too, had my friend not said, “And here’s Amy!  You remember Amy!”  [whimper]  He shook my hand and said, “Nice to meet you.”  I laughed – that airy laugh reserved for moments of sheer and utter panic.  And it went downhill from there.  Seriously.  I was a mess.  He asked what I was up to and I mumbled, “Writing.”  “What? I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you.” “I write … I’m a writer … I’m boring.”  No, my friends, I did not make that up.  I said it.  Out loud.  Twice actually, because he tried again before he left.  It’s like I have this overwhelming need to confirm the worst they could possibly think of me.

Let’s all say it together … good times …